1. Socrates deletes his account.
2. Plato posts screenshots of Socrates.
3. Aristotle unfollows Plato.
4. Aquinas retweets Jesus.
5. Descartes mutes Aquinas.
6. Locke mutes Descartes.
7. Kant unfollows Locke and Descartes.
8. Hegel subtweets Kant.
9. Schopenhauer blocks Hegel.
10. Marx likes Hegel.
11. Nietzsche gets hacked.
12. Heidegger DMs Arendt.
13. Adorno reports Heidegger.
14. Derrida gets verified.
15. Heidegger gets banned.
16. Wittgenstein only does Instagram.
Source: Swiped from Kevin Hill, who swiped it from Twitter.
Related: My posts in Intellectual History.